what happened?
ermm. i havent been updating my blog and yes yes. i m very sorrie. these days, been on the low, and i didnt quite like tht feeling at all.its like, everything is the end of me. from the day i fell, and had stitches on my shin, i felt bad enuff. plus school stuffs, and relationship, family, i thot i ought to explode one of these days. but then, i realise how impt it was for me to hang on despite the hardest time. true, sometimes i feel tht i m lying to myself, or rather, u know, tell myself tht everyday will be a good day. but these days, i kept thinking tht i had been deceiving myself. the thing is, i didnt. until now, when i recollect, deep down inside of me, i knew i didnt. everyday is still a good day. there may be times tht are bad enuff tht i cry every nite. and now i think back, i would very much supposed tht it was because i m feeling real bad deep inside, like rotten and foul, and i just wanna scream at everyone, throwing tantrum, flaring up, hit the walls, jump from the overhead bridge, and lotsa lotsa more drama mama. and the stitches on my shin, "immobilised" me. i haven been jogging, which i enjoyed most. and i cant dance, which means i cant practise. each time i jump, or when my calf stretched to the side, i can feel the pain. everything i like, at the tip of my down-down syndrome. hahha. so practically after two weeks of all these hassles, i finally made a breakthru'. i went jogging just now. i am realli very happy and contented, i jump, prance and dance when i jog by the roadside. and i enjoy tht feeling. ") yupp. many objected the idea because i haven remove my stitches, as of, yet. i was lil pissed cos all my GP closed so early. sucker. haha. and i just sleep a few times today. not the usual me. and i know i have to do something, because, i m just like on the verge to breaking down. so i decided tht, i shuld just go for a jog. AND YES ARH! its worked for me, perfectly. ") well, i feel much better. hmm, reallie. like not emotional, fresh, and energised. ") hmm. i wanna go out now. but its kinda late. so i wil stay at home. i m glad i m like tht now. sometimes if life takes u down, don worry, u wil go up after u went down. ") just smile. yay. seriously. arhs. i feel refreshed! hahha! and yes yes. lotsa project on hold. i nitta get them done real soon. i wil study tmr. yes yes. keke. i m independent, i shuld be like tht right? i slept kinda alot today. so i cant realli sleep now. haha. almost every sat i say tht? haah! alrite lahs. ") take care okie. i m going to ying's house tmr to study for test while she do her project. ") muacks.
my saturday!
i went roller blading today. this is my first fall, from a Slope, very very steep, and i landed on my bum. i went down so damn fast, and yes, my bum, so painful. keke. and these scratches was the slightest i can get. ahem.
and then and then. i had a second fall.. from a slight gentle slope and i thot i was doing fine, who noes my blade slant left side, and hit the rails, my shin instantly split open.. i heard shreks and repetitions of "Ohmygod" and the trauma on their face was hilarious. the blood just came flowing down, and my bf was in shock. they put tissue paper and secure it with my socks, tying it tight. and i had to walk back barefooted from somewhere near bedok jetty to bike rental centre beside the tennis court.. with sooooooo much pain tolerance. i cleanse the wound with just water, and when i settle down on a chair, they finalise tht i shuld stitch up the wound. keke. Bf's best frens ask'd why i look like it was a mild and almost nothing pain, becos i look relaxed and chilled. oh well. i cant explain.
i call'd a cab, i told the operator " i need a cab, cos i m BADLY injured." hahahahH! initially i wanted to go to the doc on sun morning. but i thin, by tht time, i probably would haf worsen the whole condition by delaying treatment on time. i went to the EASTSHORE A&E, nearest( and expensive too) to east coast. 
i wrapped my leg with the blue towel.
this is after the stitches. i had 5. when they inject the LA, it was kinda painful. but after tht, i can feel the stitch piercing thru my skin, and i felt excited in fact. haaha. damn. kinda sick right. haha! yes its painful. very. but the thing is, i am able to bear with it. and bloody eastshore is not cheap okie. so expensive sia. i had a tatanus jab too, cos the doctor fear tht the railings might be rusty or something tht sort. i paid 279dollars for all okae. and yes, my bf foot my bill, but i wil haf to pay him back of course. : ) thanks boyfriend. and sorrie for making the scene, new friends i made today.. thanks jamilah for the helping me up.. ohh. but i still feel its a good day after all. i haven been living alive these days, becos i sem to lost myself. i found myself and i shuld be hapy. i will be. just tht i cant exercise for quite sometime. *sighs. wel well, life's still good! : ) thanks syg, i love you muacks. and sorrie my darling princess elene for making u worried sick. i m fine. i will be. take care okie. hearts you. : )
AUNTY AGONY
DEAR aunty agony
i have been bugging you to give me a long hair and it hasnt seem to be working. so when is it coming? i need those LONG HAIR! ARGHS! and ii just gotta know tht, NAPFA is ten weeks away. which means, i will be veri much dead soon? nah, i wont. i know. i will jus train for it right. so dear aunty agony, please give me a pretty face and a hotter bod', and a happier self, always.
Love,
Me. : )
arghs. yes. it almost drove me crazy by envying people are hell great time. i've been looking at dawnyeo's (http://www.dawnyang.com) webby. i just cant deny her beauty. well, i dont reallie care if she does go for a surgery thingy. i mean, if she did, tranformed herself, and she is do gorgeous now, i dont mind man. who dont want a hot bod' right.
i've been thinking so hard how to get tht beautful sexxaayy abs and i am almost going crazy. i cant excude the fact tht i am green because i envy ppl too much. yes yes, darlings, i know i should learn to love myself like real lot. but then..
certain things just hit my head hard, i was thinking, is keeping up so difficult? i would say expensive and hmmm.. patient. well, i wouldnt wake up so early just to put on make up to go to sch. and yes, i definitely need to revamp my wardrobe. i love mascaras, and of cos, i would love to have a nice complexion. its so difficult. and i think, i need to eat a good diet. i have to stop all those junkies but i so love them! how to quit!!!!!! well, ahem, i can do it. oh no! so excruciating, but i just have to keep on moving right. they told me to. and yes yes. phew. i try.
they say i just have to believe in myself. i aint so sure, but i thnk i can do it. after all losing tht 25 kgs over the years was kinda hard but i made it. ( i just lost 2 kg most recently :) ) hmmm hmmm. : ) okie. tht means i need to nap now, and then jog at my 8pm! i wil be back! love u people, muacks. alright. cheerios. love you. *winks.
the pain
a few days back i was having this bad bloated feeling down in my tummy. it feels like i wanna puke, and it feels like i dont wanna eat. Oh yes, leekheng, wasnt it supposed to be a happy thing tht u r not eating, woohoo oh the fact tht, i realli didnt feel very comfortable and i think it almost killed me becos my lovelie friends giving all kinds of diagnosis. haa. i feel better when i curl up like a coccoon, nah. i mean hug my lil tummy, and squat down.
my boyfriend bought me this.. and oh.. the taste is not so bad. ermm.. yes... its ginger flavour. okok, i noe.. its kinda err.. ah. i shant explain further. but i would say, its nice. i think so. thanks syg. : )
i had this ache, and yes, till' now i stil feel it. but it has definitely gone down. : ) thanks ppl.
i had labs, and twas reallie fun. probably becos the fact tht our very own lecturer was not there for the whole week. and we met funny lecturers and there are reallie good. and theres this lecturer i think he made my tummy aches worst becos of his hilarious jokes. i almost went breathless with the increasing pain and the uncontrollable chuckles. hahah. there was this part he talked about air stewardess with insensible english accent, and said this to an caucasian eating fishballs " oh sir, would u like some tomato sauce on ur balls? " HOMAIGORD. i was on the verge of CODE BLUE sia. haha. twas reallie funny when he told us. hahaha.
i finished watching finally. forgive me, its actuali just a MOVIE and it took me so long to watch it. One chinese guy. One Mly Girl. One unforgettable Love story. i confessed, i almost cried when Orked (the girl) read the letters in the car. and when Loong just kept on tearing, when Orked finds a new bf. In the end, when Orked was in the car after reading the letters, she tried to call Loong, the third time she got thru. but the thing is, Loong was on his way to see Orked b4 she leaves for her scholarship. but he was alrd dead.. how did he ans the call? there Orked said to him "there was two things tht i nv told u, and one of it was i never did tell u how much i love you. i reallie love you"
yes yes. i somewhat like this kind of soppy shows and cry a deal outta it. haha.
okkie. i haf full loads of projects on my list to work on. ar. work hard. :) muacks.
first day of a new sem
okie. school was fun as ever, and my princessie actuallie offer me to slap her during lecture, and she goes, "Lee kheng, slap me." can u see how not boring lectures were and not to mention boring lecturers . school's still as crowded, with overwhelming freshies, plus us oldies, and u can imagine how pack it would be to be in the lift. one moment u are stil standing outside the lift, next moment u are squeezing into the lift like those of processing tuna into cans. and u see the door closed, open the nex sec hearing some weird-stylie shouting "oh, i didnt press i didnt press". kinda cranky. and the nex lvl the door shuffle open slowly and u see a crowd staring into the lift, i tried my best to comfort them, " well, theres space on top of us" what i meant was if u like to fill in the spaces. well, everyone has a slight change and look fresh. needless to say, me except the part on losing weight. oh weell, i suddenly see some of the girls came back with Permmies, i was rather noob, so i told my cliche " eh, i thot perms are no longer a trend but i see ppl with perms again." so they said well, they like it tht way. and i replied snoobishly "oh reallie, curlies were long ago and now tht i alrd turn straight." *grins. i meant my hair, for goodness sake. haha. weird days. i would. he had said he wanna kip low profile, and let ppl uncover themselves. on the other hand when he held up my hand, it contradicts to what he say. and i did not let go, he try to shove my hands off. i m confused. what was tht supposed to mean? well. weird enuff. and, i m not gonna ask. becos.. i m too lazy alrd. by anyway. *shrugs.oh yes. i think i shuld go on a strict diet, if i want a hot bod. what do u think. but right now, most imptly i get my short lil nap, and there i go, jogging at 8.15pm. : ) bless me, hope it dont rain or feel like shitting like the other time. HA HA! okkie cya around. and i wil reckon th this is a GOOD START, and i mean GOOD. with lotsa wonderful moments, and sweet days, oh. yes. it will be. *grinns.
JB trip
WA HA HA HA! yes, ppl, I BOUGHT MY FIRST LEVI'S JEANS! HA HA HA! yes. tht is how happy i am! haha. homaigord. haha. it only cost me RM99 becos its the last few pieces and last day's promotion!
the thing was, ytd i met jasmine together with lian and willy at kranji mrt stn, so we can take a bus in to JB> SIngapore custom is so much more organised, they haf rails, so ppl can queue in line and its air conditioned, so when theres a large crowd, we wouldnt be so farkened frustrated. OH! u dont know HOW good my patience was( evn i dont know), and i queue at MSIA's custom for an hour plus just to get my passport "Chop". three words to describe the long waiting time where short ppl like me can wait and die of insufficient fresh air and smelly armpits and soaked sweat smell from man and the increasing *chut sound fromthe impatience ppl, it will be KNN (pls ad abit of english accent). and then we walked to Citysquare, we had kenny rogers, i always thot what would they sell over there, roasted rabbit? arh crap. hahaa. well, not so fantastic leh~ they miss out my muffins. but i would go back for the muffins. its just taste so yummi-licious. hahah!
their top lvl haf a tinch like far east, hmm. yay. i've got nth to buy there. initially i thot there was topshop over there, but there wasnt any. hmm. onli mango. i m not a mango person. i just cant find anything i want. so irritating. so i just pop by levi's, and YES YES! i mean ys.. my levi's jeans. i wanted to try their size 32.. onli to realise its big for me. i am confused. and i bought size 29, can u believe it??! haha. wweelll, too oveerrrwheellmed either. haha. and den i bought lingerie. thts another amusing moment. welll.. onli myshopping kaki LAWA Melur knows. haha. well, i wuld name her miss shopping queen now! haha!
i helped syg to buy cigs. well.. its my first time buying cigs,i haf no freaking ideas. haha. so i went to the indian mama shop.
me: ermm, sampoerna ... (turn to Lawa Melur) samepoerna what arh? (Lawa melur looked confused), orh, methol, methol
Indian man1 : (took from the shelf), nah.
me: ehh.. what size is this arh? (Indian man1 and 2 looked confused ) oh i mean u got different size right, medium? (they stil look confused)
Indian man 2: we onli haf one size. one size (with their strong indian accent)
me: oh, ok. so this's the large one?
indian man 2: yay, big one, big one.
*pouts. its so funny now i think back. homaigord, i m reallie kinda dumb. hahahaha! i think i wanna go there as when i get my pay. haha. buystuffs frombodyshop, and lingerie, and my levi's. oh man. i dont wanna miss it! haha. but i wish there would b topshop. hmm, maybe i ask around and see. hha.
well, many weeks of attachment have pass and th includes days of bread and milk for mealtime. haha. but i actuallie did enjoy attachment, except the part where sombody said "they deserved it" when i was being complained by somebody. and she could stil pretend like there wasnt anything she said. it is reallie reallie reallie getting me on my nerves. arghs. okkie. school is starting, i foresee theres so many new challenges, so many new outlook, and more fun, haha. hmmm. yr 3, excitments are just round the corner. yay. many things to learn, and all of us will keep on moving. all of us are going towards a direction, although we didnt quite noe where wil we be tmr, but its worth waiting for sunrise each morning. :) thanks life.
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