reflections
aights. i dont know what to update either. hmms. well. been lacking in sleep since last thurs. lotsa drama in my life. went to the praying ceremony at sengkang.it ended like 12 plus and i had to rush home cos next day is stil a MORNING working day. well. at least i didnt play my day out today. i Did report writing and i passed report. keke. *sighssometimes i spend a minute thinking about everything i have in life. i realise how sweet and great the life i am leading now. at least now, i feel so much less hectic. so much relax-able. so much of laughters. so much of myself in this lil world of mine. no longer a world divided into so many pieces. i m in one piece. i wanna thanks somebody for a sudden reminder via a sms saying tht "放下并不是忘记过去，而是把现在提起；把握这一刻". prolly, after all this while, after tis while, nearing 4months after breaking up, i feel so much more easier about myself. i grow to love myself. it doesnt reallie matter whether i gets somebody at the nd of it, it only matters, whether i had live a good and wonderful, eventful, meaningful life since then. well. i did. i supposed. *chuckles. i sat at the ledge the other time alone, during the chalet. so many thots. sometimes i wuld rather stay single. becos i feel better. *smiles. sometimes, i feel like i wanna get attached, but only to realise tht theres reallie no such need, becos i realli can take care of myself. i learn to be stronger. and given my stub, i dont think i want any commitment. and the fact tht i learnt no more dependent on someone, i find myself living better and happier. i m not fragile, darlings. well. its not up to me to say this, i know. prolly my fair princesses would be yelling at the top of their voice when they see this. well. its better off at least i m straight now okae. so theres nothing u 3 shuld b yelling about. *laughs. i know i've been like nagging to princessa and princessie tht if theres a good catch, pls catch. well, u 2 shuld catch. my main concern became more focus on all my friends. i no longer wanna lose them again. i m telling myself this alot of times. what hell care. *laughs. besides, hmms, if only my heart start to beat faster.. i noe its coming. :) it just not here yet. *grins.
keke. my doggie and me. i mtrying to make him angry. arhs! pardon my big head! kekek! i love him, seriously, i reaalie doo.
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my godSis and me. keke. so nice. i like this pict. keke. heys heys. i wanna y goodbye to my black hair soon.
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well, i look like a ghost i guess. hmms. whatever lahs huh. plastic or not, stil me. (okae, nasharudin)
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so sweet isnt it? a sweet and simple wedding.yet fill with love.
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Sun outing: YouReneMe. keke. we r bullying our ke ai ke ai de Rene! keke!
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sat outing ReneYouME. i love tis pict with rene. keke. taken by You outside paragon there. so nice the background!
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unpredictable life
life is unpredictable. dont u think so. a moment, u r happy, nest moment, u may be crying. i am 18. and i am thinking like so many things. so many fears. it feels like i never want to grow up now. it feels like i wanna cry my whole lungs out now. it feels like i wanna be mummy' hirl forever. it feels like i wanna be pampered now. it feeels so many feelings. which is which. i have totalie no idea. my uncle died an unnatural death while he was driving. he survived all the illnesses he had, and died while driving today. i dont know. it feels like life is so unpredictable. totali. i dont know if its awesome. or if its wondrous. prolly, destiny reallie am playing the bigggest part. u cant stop things from coming in. i've gotta accept life like it i. meanwhile, live it to the fullest. i know. i apologise, sincerely, to the one who saw me tearing today. i am sorrie. i feel weak at tht moment when tears were unbearable.i love life still, cos they taught me many valuable lessons. sometimes, it takes a hurting journey to learn something. still. =) thank god. i had lost friendship once,when i was in love, now that i had all the love from my friends, i nv want to lose it again. its not like i wont fall in love again. however, its doesnt mean i wil too. arghs. "whatever". (jenhuei taught me tis, =P)well. i m gonna like do some changes/investment to myself. yay. hmm. to package myself. orites. i hope i get to shed off like 5kgs? arghs. take care peeps.
Hilarious weekend i had! kekeke.
i had a hialorious SAT. b4 i culd even leave for class, i nitta bathe. who noes, no one culd predict it happens..(i was in the bathroom and my dad came runnig behind the toilet outside the house)PA: Qing arh! bathing arh! i need the keys to open the doors ehs!Me: huh.. ok ok. i pass to u loh. Pa: ya.( i ran to my 'balcony' wantng to pass him the keys but he was behind the toilet) Me: pa! where u want me to pass u they keys?! from the toilet arhpa: yay, throw from the windows sliding panel bah!Me: huh.. sure arh.. ok loh(the keys go STUCKed)Me: OMIGAWD. Nvm, PA i take my keys! u wait hor! Pa: Nvm! i can get it i can get it!Me: PA~!too late. the nex moment i heard a loud "piak!" with loud water gushing out sound from the pipes. yay. !*hilarious omigawd. i cant believe tht it actuallie happens! i almost cry outta laughter!! HHAH! but tht's not al.. the bigggest freaking angry prob i encounter was.. i CULDNT bathE! cos there's NO WATER! U NOE wat it means to haf no water? i cant wash my lovely face, i cant wash my biggie hands, i cant wash my adorable eyes.. shit! AND.. i cat love my body wth the warm warm water tht gives me all the love in the world~!anyways, the clas was like fun! haah~! i m in love with it! keke! deply in love! though there r queries..after tht YiwenHuinaME went to suntec, tihnking we could practise there. bu here are like so many hanky-panky ppl at the skygarden. almost every corner. gosh. its like.. no lah. i dont wan to go into details abt it. went out at 8pm to meet nasha at orchard. we walked around, eat the shaky's, HMV, and went to chill at forum's coffeeebean. haha. twas like so funnie. i sometimes enjoy his accompany cos he've go likr tonnes of hilarious stuffs tht could make me *pout but laugh at the same time. HAHA. things they did just amaze me soo muchie. haha~ i have got so much of chuckling last nite and i almost lost my voice.. i realise i have the tendencies of luffing at the slightest and silliest stuffs.. yay nasha?left around 12am tookbus 65 to meet HuinaAimeiGuangliangYongsengEugeneSinhongQiuwei at boon keng prata. they alwaes got cheeky ideas and amusing stuffs tht could keep ur eyes on their conversation. after tht went to seng's place. watch Howl's moving castle, but i fell asleep. haehah. i squeeze a matrress with 2 person. omigawd. hahah~! it was freaking cold.no aircon. we left the house at7 in the morning. i realie enjoy moments of sat like that. i dont know how wil life goes as days pass. but one thing for sure is, i love the kinda life i have now. reallie.
maple story
*smile!
been listening to jay's 枫. i was so attracted by the title of this song itself. maple leaves. i have a few of it, and i reallie do love it.
their shape is special, differing from the other leaves, the special teak red color gives people an distinctive impression. it onli blooms when autumn comes, and slowly falls when autumn ends, season going toward cold winter.it has like five edges, just like our hands. and it slowly falls from a big tree when the breeze come, it feels like ur world have lotsa lotsa warm hands reaching out to you.
haha. i have no idea why am i blogging about this. but it just hit my mind. *smile. well, been like thinking lotsa stuffs recently.
缓缓飘落的枫叶像思念
我点燃烛火温暖岁末的秋天
it wasnt so emo for me. like i have lotsa things to share, to tell, or even, at this moment this time, i have an urge to cry. yet even before i start crying, i swallow the saliva down the throat, and there, i stop my tears. *lol最近
我常爱窝在一个角落
反省一切一切的一切
才发现其实自己
现在的生活开心多了
至少没有以前那么
爱哭
爱闹
爱发脾气
也或许
渐渐 从意识中
慢慢的恢复过来
就连
坐在寂寞边缘时
聆听沉寂已久的心情
听见风铃摇曳
清晰的打入心里时
随风而来
阵阵的铃声
回想的也只是
发黄的记忆
并没有遗忘
并没有悲伤
我是乎以经想不 起
遗失的眼泪
那一霎那的感觉
那心跳加速的律动
已黯然离我而去
我不觉得稀奇
更谈不上周杰伦《枫》
“让爱渗透了地面 我要的只是你在我身边”
我并没有那么想
现在
我一直在走我的路
跟着自己的地图
一直走下去
我还没找到我的巴士站
也没有想搭的巴士
我只想就这样走下去
等到我的巴士停在眼前
向我招手
我不会在等。。
my wondrous weekends
oh yay~! finally after a stressful week in the ward, i get to enjoy a nite out with my friends~! haha~! friday nite i went out with BangKenCorrinepretty~ went to sakae and its reallli so fullll!!! i misss them so muchie~! hahah~!aights, we haf losa funtalks and we walked to boat quay den esplanade. hae haae..random talks(as i tried sitting up the rails by the river of boat quay)ken: OIE! DONT TRY HOR! later fall back i hav to save u hor!BAng: yay lah! walao, i tmr dont want to go potong pasir hor. *gigglesken: bang, if u haf to save somebody frm the water wad wil u take out first?bang: of cos my tops laKen: HAHA! i wil take out my bottoms first. *chuckles. but my lil' bro wil feel cold ehs. (LOL!)random talks 2Bang: boring lehs. buy liquor want or not?Corrine: *stared. NO loH! i go home ok. Ken: WHY?!Corrine: u all get drunk embarrass me OK! (wahaha..)they are cut arent they. wahaha. great! we also discussed where to hang out tis christmas. well, we havent come to a confirm conclusion yet. errr. hehe. anyways, whereever we are, its stil the whol lot of us together tht is important. I am sure this year i m not gonna watch them sleep.i will sleep first den. *geees.orites. and today went to ikea with PaMaJie to walk! twas fun loh! wahah! its beeen sooooooo long we hang out together. hahah~! jie intended to buy a sofa bed. but where wil our bunk bed go? i want to revamp the whole room too. like haf arug, a new quilt covertt kin of thing. kekke. i guess it wuld b great yay? keke. we see so many many things, we sleep on the bed. jump on the sofa, eat n eat. hahah!.we even went prata-ing! so fattening loh~! waaaha~H! but nvm lahs. =P oh yay. tmr is another week. okie dokie. work hard, pray hard and live life happily~! haah~! i loe the life i m leading now. though alone, but i haf great times. reallie. keke. never had i find life so enjoyable like now. learn to appreciate things, love life, love my friends and family. keke. yay. great! one thing for sure is, the key to happiness is, to appreciate the smallest thing in life. yay. muacks.aip, princesses, take care! life's great!
i like tis pict. see my beloved dog, frankie. behind is dong dong, my gay-po dog.
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there's a MAGGOT IN MY ICECREAM!!!!!!!!!!! nahs. i was just kiddng. there's a lava? ( i was eating lava brownie chocolate ice creams from buds.)
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sakae nite 11nov: my new slippers. big seh! wahahahaha~!
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sakae nite 11nov, they r in style. hahaha.
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Gays are outrageous nowadays. look wad they r doing in public and u wil know.
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sakae Nite 11nov: ken and his new bf. well they look kinda matching. =)
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i met a cute guy todae. i wanted to ask for his number. he was reluctant, so iasked if i culd take pic with him, he said "as u wished", he din evn look a the camera.. rude aint he..
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wow wow wow! tiss is an italian dessert PAnna Cotta~ its so delicious. u scoop a lil and tip it into ur mouth, u feel it melts at the tip of ur tongue and savour in the sweet bitter taste of it~! great aint it?!
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family day out: mum n jie! wooho~! mummy where u looking arhs!
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family day out : dad and me acting cute! heehhe!
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family Day out: tis the 'dessert' after prataing, woohOOO~!
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family day out : hehe! me & jie on the bus! kekke! cute rite? many say we look like couples, well, i think they r blind. we r in love, becos we r sisters, muacks! i love u jie~!!
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the sound of heartache
i heard the sound of heartache
knocking at my doori've seen memories recollects
eleven years ago
or maybe twelve
i cant be so sure anymore.
the thought of it
culd just make me
flood the whole pillow
late at nite.
my first eye contact
with him
i first kissed him
i first hugged him
i first call'd out his name
i first fed him
i first bathe him
my first strolled
with him
it all felt like
'twas just yesterday
i wish i could call out
his name evn when i turn
thirty
forty
or evn fifty
as long as i had live
i wish he wuld b there
my heart aches
like
i had never felt before
'twas more sad (den breakin' up with tht fuggin' bth)
more intense
more excruciating
more teeth-gripping
much more strongerthe fact
or rather.
the fears
they surfaced
they arose
right from the
bottom of my heart
they pile up
whilst bringing tears down.
i love him alot.
i reallie reallie do.
be it how times when i said
"he's bad. i don love him anymore"
i am lying.
i know deep inside.
i never had loved something
sooooo muchie
tht the thought about him (leaving me)
sooon, or evn now,
hurts. (a fuggin' damn lot)
every tear of mine
contain
his shadows
his barks
and the times
when he run around
and have lotsa fun
Now
i comforted him
i kissed him
i look at his eyes
he slept by my side,
softly.
i call'd out his name
he's still as grouchy
i wish he wil always be
there.
to be grouchy.
i wish i can reduce his pain now.
they'd told me
a shot culd put him to sleep forever,
and reduce his pain.
and it aches a hell fuggin' lot.
a hell fuggin' lot.
they'd told me
its a natural process.
aged, and leave the mortal
"dont be sad"
it kept ringing.
how is eleven years
of him (in my life)
compared to
"natural process"
i cant inervene.
neither could i not be sad.
here's the diff.
he live for eleven wondrous years
in my life
and he will leave forever-years
undergoing natural process.i understood.
therefore i beseech
that learnt something.
learnt to
appreciate MORE
to love life
to love all the people
and to love myself
i dont know how long
he can live
from now.
but at least
i learnt the most precious lesson
in my life.
thanks to him, Frankie. my beloved Dog, still.
i feel a lil' pressurised
i haven been lidat for a long duddduhh time. but tis time.. not tht serious, but rather. confusing. u noe. so many many things on my mind. so many. i am beraft of words. reallie. i am. like i couldnt breathe yay, the fact tht my productive cough and blocked nose oso cause me difficulty in breathing, anyways aights. i wanna meet my friends. i need 'em. my random dosage of lovey friendship.
HuiNA and me! i m kind asleeepy. kekee~! i somtimes think i do look like a witch.. *hmmm
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know whats tis? keke. PASTIC BAG FOLDED AND TIED WITH RUBBERBAND. yay,wo did it? my dearest buddd, yong seng. kekkekek!
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heheh! i like this pict! hehehe. the 4 gers! from top left, yiwen, huina, me Sin hong! keeeke!
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tis is MIng ZAi! cute marh?! kekekkkke! da shao ye doing catering, whahahahaah~!
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-The SEVEN 'deadly' stuffs-
Seven [7] things tht wil scares me...[+] cockroachies[+] the plush eeyore at my bedside start eeyoree-ing ( i dreamt of tht recently)[+] girls with long armpit hairs[+] men with extreme odour from the armpits(i nearly died on mon on the bus frm the "fragrant")[+] no more laughter, fun, excitement, and smiles from my ppl.[+] going blind and sick[+] growing fat and lookin' UGLY. Seven[7] things that I like most..[+] chocolates[+] hanging out with my friends! NYP, BSS, BCB. I love 'em[+] Music and dance[+] laughter and smiles frm my ppl, my world.[+] a BIG wardrobe with lotsa clothes[+]MOney for Shopping, heaven's love for me.[+] SHOEs. yay. i wanna haf lotsa them! there' alwaes a but.. M-U-M-M-Y. Seven[7] most important things in my room...[+] Fan[+] PC[+] wardrobe[+] handphone[+] alarm clock[+] TV and SCV[+] MIRROR, tis is crucial. veri. yay. i m vain. ok?Seven[7] random facts about me...[+] err, i have big dreams, it is to have a chain of casket business, for goodness, any partners?[+]i never had white bras (onli recently. oops)[+]i am in love with sexaayyyy lingerie and diry dancing. argh, but i don do them. i aint QUALified[+] i like to laugh when i watch horrors[+] i alwaes haf blanket-kicking habits.. as evidenced by Elene, Chiew Lian, HUina[+] i Pray before i sleep [+] i sleep with fan and a comforter and blanket. Seven[7] things I can do[+]listening to songs, blogging, MSN-ing, typing assignment and on the phone at the same time. i done it 4 times oreadi. *winks[+] i do household chores. sweeping, mopping, cleaning up the house. yay. modern cinder-fat-lah. [+] i walk across the road w/o seeing vehicles. as evidenced by boyboy.[+] i can walk the whole of orchard road and not getting anything. (-_-')[+] i can meet 3 different groups of ppl in a single dae. hae hae. multi-dating. *winks[+] i can see with my eyes, smell with my nose, eat with my mouth, and hear with my ears. imptly, i speak with my heart.[+] i can laugh. *chuckles.Seven[7] things I cant do...[+] stop talking[+] dance[+] stop eating[+] SLIM DOWN[+] pick nose and tip into mouth[+] save money[+]wear bikini and dive into the sea (kill me, ppl, kill me with tht)Seven[7] phrases I say the most...[+] Reallie..?[+] NArrrrr Buayyyyy. nar bey oso can. [+] yay sia![+] ok ok ok? [+] you noe you noe you noe?![+] si mi sai[+] 小乌龟 小乌龟 吃饭要细啧慢咽 妈妈便秘第十天 为什么那么可怜不能呃大便
好可怜 好可怜Seven[7] celebrity crush...[+] Andy[+] Sam Lee[+] shawn Yue[+] Tom Welling[+] MarioN [+] NONO[+] cute boys with skin headSeven[7] peeps that I love to see them doing this quiz[+] some i wished to see oreadi done, kenny and corrine[+] elene[+] princessa[+] Lisa[+] esther[+] ZAvier[+] princessie[+] hmm. just copy n paste n do. n ask me to see. heehe!
